My daughter Rose and I recently attended a two week meditation retreat and left Prince George with my husband Chris who is unused to having to attend to his needs and keep him entertained. During this time, Chris wrote the Cat Dairies and emailed them to us each day. Today’s offering is delightful, and the’postscript is hilarious.
The Old Man And the Beast
The first light of morning was still trying to prize its way through the grey and damp morning when the beast leapt. He knew what he wanted and he knew how to get it. With strength and precision he landed squarely on the chest of the old man. With eyes shining but teeth hidden he bunted the old man in the face. The old man felt the weight on his chest and the wet nose on his face. He glanced at the clock and cursed when he saw it was only 6am. But he also knew what he had to do.
He raised his hands to preen the beast, his long gnarled fingers caressing the beast’s fur in the places that he knew the beast would like. The beast purred. After several minutes trying to appease the beast’s appetite for such things, the old man’s hands fell away and rested on his chest . The beast showed his appreciation by licking the man’s fingers, but fearing the old man would fall asleep again and not give him what he needed, the beast bared his razor sharp incisors and bit both of the old man’s hands. This had the desired effect. The old man reluctantly raised himself from the bed and slowly shuffled after the beast. He was led straight to the laundry where the beast circled him in anxious expectation. The old man relented and gave sacrificial offerings to the beast who proceeded to devour them. Seizing his chance, the old man shuffled back to his room, quietly closing the door behind him, praying the beast would leave him in peace.
Excerpt from the novella -The Old Man And the Beast-, published by Awful Indies .com. “‘We take the Awe out of Awesome”. No rights reserved. All parts of this extract may be reproduced in print or electronic media. The words may be printed, cut out, rearranged and pasted together to form a threatening letter, or they may be translated into Romanian or Ancient Greek without fear of legal action.
This weekly Cute Cat Column is written by or about Prince George, my Burmese cat. If you enjoyed this story and you’d like to read more Cat Columns, sign up to receive blog posts by email – eyes right for the sign up box. Prince George appears in my Diamond Peak Series as Twitchet, and in my Prunella Smith series as Merlin.
